15 SECRETS ABOUT SUCCESS AT WORK

Why is “Craig” so successful? Why did “Minh” just get that promotion? How did your former colleague land the job you interviewed for last week? After all, your technical skills are superior. Why them? Why not you?

Soft vs. Hard

In most cases, soft skills will beat out hard skills every time. What are soft skills? Soft skills are all the skills that help you to be a good person. Soft skills are the skills that enable your hard skills to shine. If you are a computer, soft skills are the software that makes your hardware (technical skills) run effectively.

Too abstract for you? You want real life examples, something concrete. Here is a list of some of the most important soft skills:

1.       Listening

2.      Politeness

3.      Good manners

4.      Smiles easily and frequently

5.      Easy going

6.      Don’t hit people (includes making threats of violence)

7.      Friendly

8.     Respectful

9.      Shares

10.  Fairness

11.   Put things back where you found them

12.  Clean up your own mess

13.  Don’t take things that aren’t yours

14.  Say you’re sorry when you hurt someone

15.   Follow through

Let’s look at the first one in this list, “Listening.” There are various levels of listening. A first level is listening for what the person is saying. Often times, we are formulating an answer while they are talking. Often times we think this will show how quick-witted we are by how fast we can respond. Just the opposite is true. While you are formulating your response, you are missing the next piece of information. Which can be fatal at work.

The second level is to listen for the true meaning of the conversation. What is said and what is not said all play an important role in understanding what is meant in the conversation. The deepest level of conversation also considers the intention of what is, and is not, said. This level of consideration includes not judging the speaker. We attempt to see their point of view. We are in the present moment, paying attention to all aspects of the communication (words, tone of voice, body language). We are empathetic to the speaker’s feelings and thoughts. We suspend our own thoughts and feelings so our attention focuses on the speaker.

Which level of listening do you do at work? If you think you can multi-task and listen, you aren’t listening.

In a job interview, it is vitally important you at least get to the second level of listening. Interviewers often ask two-part questions. If you only answer the first part of the question, because you didn’t hear the second part, you won’t get the job. If your boss constantly has to repeat what they say to you, you won’t get the promotion.

Good to great listening skills will benefit you at work. More importantly, it will benefit you at home.

Sharing

Let’s look at sharing. There is the obvious, share the copier. But, do you also share the credit? You might be on a team or you might be on a solo project. Do you share the credit for a job well done? Yes, you should be sharing credit even on a solo project. You want to thank your mentor or your boss or the person who gave you the project. Maybe you want to share the credit with your colleague who took you out for coffee when you were stuck. That change of pace, let you come back refreshed and with a new perspective.

Maybe it was the project from hell that no one wanted to do, so you were stuck with it. Make it good and you will shine. Make it game. How can you make it work for you? Hey, solo is solo. That is stand-alone shining. You still share the credit. It still took the department or division or your boss, to let you do the project. An opportunity is an opportunity.

When you work on a team, not everyone is on the same level. Sharing your expertise to help someone else will be noticed. That is also called mentoring. All good. Then when you need someone to share with you, they’ll be more willing. What goes around comes around.

All You Really Need To Know You Learned In Kindergarten

My apologies to Robert Fulghum. (His book, “All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten” is on soft skills). This book is a short read. It is tremendously helpful in laying out what we may have forgotten since kindergarten. Like listening, it appears simple. Like listening, it contains the basic, fundamental information to living your life.

One learns two additional things in kindergarten. Live a balanced life. When you are at work, work. When you are not, turn your attention to what you are then doing. Make time for play. Have some fun. Having a life outside of work makes you are better employee. It makes you a better, happier person too. Hold hands and stick together. Everyone needs someone. Some assembly is required. Companionship is good at home and at work. A trusted colleague, a mentor, a cohort – all will make life easier and more pleasant at work.

Another Perspective

I was at a human resources conference talking with hiring managers. When one of the hiring managers said, “I will always hire good soft skills over good technical skills.” It was unanimous, all heads shook “yes” in agreement. As another person said, “I can train for technical skills. I can’t train someone’s personality.” Take your soft skills seriously. Hiring managers and bosses do.

“We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is a habit.” Aristotle got it right. We are what we do, not just what we think. Practice what you know to be good soft skills. If you need a refresher course, read Fulghum’s book.

This week’s coaching questions:

This is a week to be introspective. Think about who you are to other people. Remember Aristotle? “We are what we repeatedly do.” That is how people know us. Intentions do not count, how we behave is what counts. “Excellence then is a habit.”

1.       As you go through this coming week, be aware as you go through your days. What are your habits? Are they good habits? In other words, do your habits serve you?

2.      Think about your performance at home and at work. Are you consistently doing your best? Ask yourself, “Do I ‘run with scissors’?” Are you following the rules? Do you “play well with others”?

3.      Do your actions match your intentions? How could you do better?

4.      Be brave and ask for feedback. Ask people, “If they could improve just one thing about you, what would it be?”

5.      Take the information you get and evaluate it. Will this change improve you or you for them? Is it something you could do? Will you do it?

A dream with a plan is a goal. A goal without a plan is just a dream.

All things are possible,

Elisabeth

Elisabeth Adler-Lund

Executive and Life Coaching

Telephone: 916 • 803•1494

E-mail: eal@EALCoaching.com